Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
porn star boner night. come get it.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
