i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
