2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
