he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
