I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize