If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
i believe in u and ur pee
Randomize
