ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Randomize
