it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Randomize
