Is it normal to miss your booty call?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
