Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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