is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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