Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
this is an emotional support booty call
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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