Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
