come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
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