She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
