There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
