So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
