It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
