D3 body, D1 cock
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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