i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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