When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize