Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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