I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize