worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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