How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
