Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
