she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
