I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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