I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
