Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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