fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
