a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
