her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize
