so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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