She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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