Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
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