i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Drunk is a universal language darling
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
