great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
