She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
