i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
It's just like the Real World with babies
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
