Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Every concussion has its silver lining
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
