the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
