hell yes lets make some ravioli
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Randomize