what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
