the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Randomize
