And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
