i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
