Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
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