i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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