their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Randomize
